French Dining Etiquette

What Could We Learn From It?

Each country has costumes and traditions we could learn from. So what are some French cultural aspects we could look at this month? We selected a few to open a discussion and make you wonder.

You may use it on your next trip to France or, perhaps, you can learn the principles behind French Dining Etiquette to apply to your own life. Either way, you will dive into a French perspective and grow culturally.

Let's start with some traditions usually present in most French families:

• All family dines together.

• Someone voluntarily serves all the family (it is seen as impolite to serve yourself). This person will serve himself for last.

• The family will only start eating after everyone was served.

What could sound rigid and exaggerated for some countries is a way of politeness in France. You may have a different perspective regarding the issue, but try to put yourself in French shoes for a while. This is the only way you can learn from them.

Waiting to eat together is a way to show consideration and respect for those you love. It shows that it does not matter how hungry you are; you are competent to control your actions, to stop and think that there are people around just like you. Everyone shares that moment in harmony. There is no need to rush for your own food as if none would be left for you. By doing so, you put people you care about at ease. When everyone shows respect for each other, everyone will surely have a more pleasant time.

It is important to understand the principle behind the rules. If there is none, or you just act thoughtlessly, you may see it as a tiresome tradition only. Moreover, understanding and learning from this French cultural aspect do not necessarily mean other cultures do it wrong at the table. It just means we can all stop and ask ourselves:

• Do I care about those around me?

• Do I enjoy the moments I spend with those I love, or am I too busy focusing on my own things?

• What can I do to put people at ease when I stop to eat with them (or perhaps in any other situation in life)?

It could be at a meeting. It can be with your family during dinner time; there is always something depending on you (and only on you) to make this time joyful and productive for everyone.

What About at the Restaurant? What Could We Learn From the French?

• Everybody arrives at the same time. A delay of 15 minutes may be tolerable. However, punctuality is expected.

• Everybody will wait for you to arrive before ordering.

Once again, this shows respect and consideration for others. A wise person once told me that when you are unpunctual, you are saying your time is more important than the time of the people who are waiting for you. In other words, you are saying those people are unimportant. Therefore, we must have in mind we speak more through action than using words.

We understand a healthy balance must be kept here. By the way, we are humans. Unforeseen events can and do happen! Or maybe you are just feeling extra lazy one day. However, when we simply do not care and are late for no reason, not telling people in advance and expecting they will be there for us, we show disrespect.

We can always ask ourselves in advance:

• How much time do I need to get to the place I am meeting my friends? What time should I leave home to arrive there on time?

• How much time do I need to get ready to leave my place around that time?

• Can I call my friends in advance to let them know I will be late if I notice I can not make it?

In some cultures, it is very natural everyone will be very late. We know that too. Getting to know these things first can avoid some annoyances. In these cultures, it is just natural to be late. Everybody is late. If you see you are in a country where people do not care about the scheduled time, you should find out how much time later people usually start showing up. There is usually also a rule here, although more flexible. Sometimes 8 pm means 8:40 or perhaps even 10:30 pm.

However, if you are from a country where punctuality has a different meaning, we would like to dare you and your friends to try to make things at a specific time for a week. Yes, we mean nobody should get late. The point is to see how does it feel for you. Looking at things in a different direction can help us grow. It does not mean you were doing wrong before. It means you are mature enough to go outside your comfort zone and perhaps learn something new, either you like it or not.

Besides, ask yourself:

• What are the traditions in your own culture you have to show respect for others? In France, punctuality is key. What is it in your country? And how can you do it more mindfully?

When we are too focused on our inner world, our experiences are poor. When we look outside ourselves, we expand our vision and grow.

Traveling to France?

Here is what you could pay attention to. Remember, these are general rules (which means exceptions exist).

• If you are invited for dinner, wait until someone serves you. It is impolite to help yourself.

• Eat slowly and just ask for more food when you finish the one you have on your plate. Do not add different types of food to the same plate. Finish the one you have first.

Curiosities About France Regarding Meals

• The French usually do not eat cheese in the breakfast as many people think. They prefer sweets (like jams, for instance).

• The French usually do not repeat meals during the week. They try to vary each day.

• At the weekend or whenever they have a lot of leftovers, this becomes the main meal.

• It is common to have a glass of wine during meals.

• The French like something sweet after their meals (but not very sweet). It can be fruit or yogurt.

If you are still here, chances are you are feeling hungry. Before you leave your computer to run for your kitchen, we would like to thank you for diving into this fantastic Francophonie world. We may speak again about France or any French-speaking country someday soon.

Going deeper in " Exploring Places" Find out more about France!

• Drinking Champagne in Champagne

Stay tuned to see the country of the next month!

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